Man's (And My Own) Search For Meaning

Have you ever wondered, what is the purpose of my life?  What are we doing all this for?  What is the point?  Why is there such vast and unspeakable tragedy?  At the encouragement of my favorite professor of all time, Dr. S., I read Viktor Frankl's Man Search For Meaning, and I was profoundly and forever not only affected, but changed.  Changed.  

Dr. Frankl was a prisoner in the concentration camps of Nazi Germany, one of them being the infamous Auschwitz.  By profession, Frankl was a psychiatrist.  He writes the book from the viewpoint of  his experience as a concentration camp prisoner AND a psychiatrist.  

I could never begin to express how tremendously I have been influenced and moved by this book, this experience.  I urge you to read it for yourself.  I want to point out a few of the life-lessons I have learned.

Frankl taught often about the concept of love.  He says, "The truth - that love is the ultimate and the highest goal to which man can aspire.  Then I grasped the greatest secret that human poetry and human thought and belief have to impart: The salvation of man is through love and in love" (Frankl, p. 57).  He goes on to say, regarding love: "Love is the only way to grasp another human being in the innermost core of his personality...By his love he is enabled to see the essential traits and features in his beloved person; and even more, he sees that which is potential in him, which is not yet actualized but yet ought to be actualized.  Furthermore, by his love the loving person enables the beloved person to actualize these potentialities.  By making him aware of what he can be and what he should become, he makes these potentialities come true" (Frankl, p. 134).

THAT is the definition of what true, abiding, undivided and eternal love is.  Great and lasting, even triumphant and immeasurable meaning can be found in not only seeking to be the "beloved", as Frankl describes, but also the "loving person", the one that sees through to the very inner core, the very soul of another human, and sees light, hope, potential, worth, even when it is not seen by the actual person.  To achieve meaning in life through the ultimate avenue of loving another human soul is to achieve what Victor Hugo describes in his infamous Les Miserables, "To love another person is to see the face of God."  

Our society is so full of inaccurate, distorted and perverted examples and descriptions of what "love" is or should be; in actuality, it really is as simple as Frankl, as well as Hugo, have described.  Real love.  Lasting love.  The type that exists between two people no matter what, that is what Frankl is describing.  Not the foolish and self-serving examples we see in mainstream media and society in general.  To awaken potential and worth in another human soul is to achieve the highest level of meaning.

Frankel discusses in dire detail the account of his experience in Auschwitz.  I could go on and on regarding what I learned from his words, but the main point is this, and it truly is this simple:  There is purpose (and meaning) to be gained from all suffering, no matter now hopeless and grim the situation main seem.  Et lux in tenebris lucet - and the light shineth in the darkness.  It always, always will.  Why?  "We must never forget that we may also find meaning in life even when confronted with a hopeless situation, when facing a fate that cannot be changed.  For what then matters is to bear witness to the uniquely human potential at its best, which is to transform a personal tragedy into a triumph, to turn one's predicament into a human achievement" (Frankl, p. 135).

What is the bottom line?  There is always CHOICE.  No matter what, no matter our circumstance or situation, no one can take away our minds, our ability to think, our experiences, our past, our memory, feelings, convictions and principles.  Not even our hope and potential for the future can be taken; that is, unless we are the ones to forsake it.  I have known people that have gone through truly unspeakable tragedies, situations or experiences.  But what happens from there can be truly miraclous.  In the face of tremendous tragedy, heroes rise, valor reigns, courage and dignity resounds and hope is victorious.  That is what the purpose of human suffering.  We have the choice; we can simply resign and surrender to the suffering, offering it meaningless, or, we can do as Frankel so eloquently not only described but lived and experienced: "Our generation is realistic, for we have come to know man as he really is.  After all, man is that being that invented the gas chambers of Auschwitz; however, he is also that being who entered those gas chambers upright, with the Lord's Prayer or the Sherma Yisrael on his lips" (Frankel, p. 157).  To suffer bravely, that is, with your head held high, is among the greatest of human triumphs.  To go on, Frankel says, "...but what can never be ruled out is the unavoidability of suffering.  In accepting this challenge to suffer bravely, life has a meaning up to the last moment, and it retains this meaning literally to the end.  In other words, life's meaning is an unconditional one, for it even includes the potential meaning of unavoidable suffering" (Frankel, p. 137).  Finding meaning is indeed possible, in spite of the most severe suffering imaginable.  This is an extremely hopeful and transcendent concept that has caused me great introspection at the "suffering" that I endure, that people I know endure and endure bravely, honorably - with their heads held high.

Now, I am not suggesting that bravely suffering is an easy task; it isn't.  It is perhaps the greatest of all challenges; to find light in infinite darkness, a darkness so deep and encompassing that it cannot be measured.  There are many days that I wonder why I have to suffer like I do, why I can't have a "normal" life, free of the chronic and debilitating pain (among other things) that I endure every day.  But, instead of succumbing to the suffering, the only other option is to rise above it.  I will not succumb, I will not surrender; but I will be victorious.  I may not be victorious every moment of every day, but that is not the point.  The point is to remain steadfast, always looking toward the future with hope and purpose, realizing that suffering is unavoidable and inescapable, but what I can control is my attitude toward my suffering.  If all I can say, at the end of my life, is that I endured the suffering bestowed on me with my head held high, then I will know that I have fulfilled my portion of meaning in my own, individual suffering; that my suffering meant something to someone, that it was not in vain.

Another recurring theme and one that I deeply believe in and have begun to actually live in my own life is the concept of choice.  The mind/body connection is intricate, delicate, like nothing else and not to be undermined.  The mind, our ability to think thoughts, live our thoughts, is uniquely human, and something that does not get utilized enough.  It is my promise, what I will give back in return for all that I have been blessed with, to live my thoughts and to never, ever let any body or entity take control of the sacred and priceless treasure that is my own thoughts.  As Frankel says, in describing the conditions of life as a concentration camp survivor, "And there were always choices to make.  Every day, every hour, offered the opportunity to make a decision, a decision which determined whether you would or would not submit to those powers which threatened to rob you of your very self, your inner freedom; which determined whether or not you would become the plaything of circumstance, renouncing freedom and dignity..." (Frankel, p. 86-87).  Do not become a plaything of circumstance.  You are better than that.  You deserve more than that.  Take charge of that control; take charge of the meaning of your life, actively seek out meaning in your life.  Make those decisions with the big picture in mind and never, not ever, submit to those powers, whatever they may be, that threaten to rob you of your very inner freedom - in essence, your soul.  You must rise above; become the type of prisoner that would choose to walk into a gas chamber, or other such circumstance, with your  head held high, looking your executioners in the eye, as you have nothing, nothing to regret and everything to have pride and dignity and honor in.

I have always believed, almost intuitively, that there is great and untapped power in the past of a human life.  I reflect often on my past; the things I'm proud of, the mistakes I've made, the suffering that I overcamed honorably and some suffering I barely endured as well as the fun, care-free innocence of childhood.  Again, the past, your past, is something that cannot be taken away from you.  When Frankl was imprisoned, he reflected often on the experiences of his past.  Frankl says, "In the past, nothing is irretrievably lost, but rather, on the contrary, everything is irrevocably stored and treasured.  To be sure, people tend to see only the stubble fields of transitoriness, but overlook and forget the full granaries of the past, wherein he had salvaged once and for all his deeds, his joys, and also his sufferings.  Nothing can be undone, and nothing can be done away with.  I should say having been is the surest kind of being" (Frankl, p. 144).  I absolutely love the imagery of the metaphor "full granaries of the past".  To think of my past or any one's past in that light sheds knew meaning, a fuller meaning on what the past really is and what it does.  The past isn't something to be ashamed of or brushed under a rug, it is something to be celebrated, appreciated for what it was and also what it was not, and fully accepting the consequences of such.  

Another substantial portion of the book deals with the concept of responsibility.  When first coming upon these sections, I was somewhat taken off-guard; how does responsibility fit into finding meaning in life?  Perfectly and acutely, actually.  Frankl says, "A man who becomes conscious of the responsibility he bears toward a human being who affectionately waits for him, or to an unfinished work, will never be able to throw away his life.  He knows the 'why' for his existence, and will be able to bear almost any 'how'" (Frankl, p. 101).  Responsibility is not only foundational, it is one of the keys to unlocking meaning in that allowing yourself to feel that sense of responsibility, or stewardship, as I like to refer to it, does indeed give greater meaning to life outside of yourself.  For example, when I became a parent is when the mantle of stewardship, or responsibility, was bestowed upon me by from what I would refer to as a higher power - something greater than myself, to in turn, do and be something greater than myself for the one I now had stewardship over.  And just as Frankl says so beautifully, once one understands the why for his or her existence, he or she will then be able to endure almost any how.  Understanding the why is such an integral part of the process in pursuit of meaning; for if you never understand the why, what would be the purpose of the how?  Find the 'why'.  Dig deep.  Do not be afraid of what resides there, what you may find.  Scrape the hidden recesses of your soul and inner core to discover what the 'why' is for you; only then can you apply the 'how'.

But what about the times of utter desolation - either of the human soul, the human body, or other circumstances.  The darkest of dark; the bottomless devastation, infiltrated with despair type of reality that is world which many are forced to face; whether by their own choices or by the choices of another.  "In a position of utter desolation, when man cannot express himself in positive action, when his only achievement may consist in enduring his sufferings in the right way - an honorable way - in such a position man can, through loving contemplation of the image he carries of his beloved, achieve fulfillment" (Frankl, p. 57).  In some cases, I firmly believe all that is required of us is to endure suffering honorably, and as Frankl describes, in the right way.  THAT, in and of itself, is purpose - meaning.  When there truly is nothing left, no hope for any change or any improvement whatsoever; when the end result is nothing but tragedy, the only thing that may be asked of us is to endure it honorably; to be steadfast, to the very end.  

To summarize and highlight what I believe to be the main point of this book, Frankl again demonstrates that in the end, it is always a choice; that we, as humans, have the unique and the God-given ability and privilege to practice discernment, to choose, to rise above any and all conditions, and not let the evils of mortality regin within us, therefore rendering us a slave to it.  No.  Rather, we take the control and never, ever raise the white flag of surrender - the surrender of our free will, our attitude and ability to choose to the evils and circumstance of mortality.  "A human being is not one thing among others; things determine each other, but man is ultimately self-determining...we watched and witnessed some of our comrades behave like swine while others behaved like saints.  Man has both potentialities within himself: which one is actualized depends on decisions but not on conditions" (Frankl, p. 157).

We cannot control our conditions, but we can always control our decisions and our ability to actualize those decisions, rendering we, as human beings with a heart and soul, the one at the helm, leading the way, guiding the path, lighting the way not only for ourselves, but for everyone in our circle of influence - and beyond.  The power to choose, and to honorably choose, is perhaps the greatest gift bestowed upon us as human beings.  It is in that power that we find meaning and purpose - finding the why, so we are more able to endure all the how's that continually come our way as we journey through this vast and precarious experience we call life.